Ultimate Fantasy Draft – OL

Enough with the skill positions.  Throw away the combine numbers and break out the scales.  Today we dive into the meat and potatoes – the offensive line.

Day 1 – Quarterbacks

Day 2 – Running backs

Day 3 – Wide receivers/Tight ends

Day 4 – Specialists


Offensive linemen (2)

Round 1

  1. Dan: Louie Lastik – Remember the Titans
  2. Kirk: Jumbo Fumiko – The Replacements
  3. Holden: Billy Bob – Varsity Blues
  4. Matt: Jamal Jackson – The Replacements

Round 2

  1. Matt: Andre Jackson – The Replacements  (TRADE)
  2. Kirk: Patrick “Madman” Kelly – Any Given Sunday
  3. Holden: Bud-Lite Kaminski – The Program
  4. Dan: Rudy Zolteck – Little Giants (TRADE)

*Matt swaps first overall picks with Dan’s fourth overall picks in the DL draft


Let’s be honest, size beats brains when it comes to the trench guys. Lastik is an absolute monster. He’s academically eligible, which is good but he’s enormous which is even more important. And Zoltek was like a vacuum. He was constantly eating. I think you could actually see him gaining mass. That’s important to me. The bigger my ‘OLine’, the less likely anyone gets through or moves them.


With my first pick, I took Jumbo Fumiko.  Dude was a sumo wrestler.  Do you know what they do?  They push other giant humans around.  He’s a smart choice and proved he could play despite having no prior background in the sport.  As far as Patrick Kelly goes, his nickname is “Madman.”  I don’t feel like I should need to explain further.  He’s a lunatic.  Can’t teach crazy.


So after grabbing my two stud running backs, I needed to sure up the offensive line. I grabbed Billy Bob and Bud-Lite Kaminski. Kaminski is a real blue chip left tackle prospect, think the Joe Thomas of fictional movie characters. Sure, he may have some anger issues, but what great offensive lineman doesn’t. Billy Bob is going to have to kick over to right tackle. He doesn’t have good enough bend to play guard and his feet aren’t good enough to play left tackle. Billy Bob was a bit of a risk because of the concussions, but when healthy, he’ll be opening up holes a truck can drive through.


AND WE HAVE A TRADE!  The Jackson brothers are elite as a pair and lost on their own, so I needed to make a move to secure their futures together.  They will anchor my offensive line and are dual threats in run and pass protection.  I lose my first overall picks in the D-Line draft but I trust my draft board and scout team to find value.  It was worth the risk to lock up these studs.

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